Thursday, August 14, 2008

A Thought for Thursday- Marriage

Since my husband and I are about to celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary (on Aug 16th), my thoughts for Thursday are about marriage.

On my MSN browser this week were some marriage tips that I agree with 100%. There were two different articles: 8 Marriage Ruts and What Happy Couples Know. I enjoyed reading them, and I hope you do too.

My marriage is not perfect by any means and I'm no expert on the subject, but with one word I can tell you mine and my husband's biggest success secret in keeping our marriage strong and healthy.

We took a marriage class when we first got married (at our own free will), and the first lesson was what stuck with me the most. The instructor had us all tell him what things cause divorce. We ended up with a big list on the board, a few of which were money problems, poor communication, infidelity, in-laws, and so on. When we were done listing these things, the instructor drew a big circle around the list and at the bottom wrote in big letters the word "SELFISHNESS". Doesn't it make perfect sense that selfishness is the root of all of these causes of divorce?? Self-centeredness is a natural human feeling. Most of us were born with it, but as we grew up and matured, we have learned to combat it in the real world.
Then we get married and we have a partner that we are working with as a team. "ME" becomes "WE" and WE have a future full of dreams, responsibilities, and family. WE must be thinking of "HE" (and visa-versa), to continue to build a strong WE.
Whenever Rod and I have rough days in our marriage, I always ask myself... "Am I being selfish?" (And sometimes even "Is HE being selfish? YES!") {{giggle}} The answer is always YES! (It may be just one of us, and sometimes it's both.) But it is a dangerous, dark place to be for too long. Once you realize it, own up to it and SNAP OUT OF IT! It's okay to apologize and admit you are wrong! It's what creates humility in our character, and strength in our relationships. Reflect on your wedding day, or the day you brought a new baby into the world together, or something special he has done for just you.
Now think about HIS love language, and do something selfless for him- just for him. Then see what happens! When we serve one another, I guarantee we grow in love for them- real, unconditional love. And what goes around, comes around!
Now, go love your husband!!
What is your marriage strengthening secret?
(Please leave a comment or email me!)
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  1. Friday night dates are a must!! No kids allowed! It's a great time to reconnect and remember why I love him!

  2. Nice thoughts- I'm in the middle of the five love languages book right now. It is an awesome read. I think everyone good or bad relationship should read that one!

    Congratulations on 11 years!

  3. Thanks for the thought today. It was great. We just celebrated our 8th on the 3rd of Aug. and had a wonderful romantic time:)

    I full-heartedly agree with this post. It's hard at times to admit (darn that pride thing!!!) but it is true!

    Thanks again!


Thank you for your comments!


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